10 rules to keep in mind before searching the former in social networks
There is nothing strange in the fact that you are interested in the current life ex boyfriend especially then as he patted your life after separation. Social networks make this a simple search as never before. And they tempt some not only a rare view but also on constant surveillance clarify details and the suffering of his happy photos with the other. To avoid embarrassment came especially if you suddenly seem that you can be together again read the simple rules and share with friends
1. interested in the life of the former well
And do not make yourself crazy detective. This is a typical female behavior especially if you want to know with whom he is currently dating says psychotherapist Mary Beth Somich. In the primitive instincts of women included the care of offspring and partner and they were ready to kill anyone who tried to prevent it. The good news is if you have grown out of the relationship the desire to monitor the life of the former comes to naught.
2. if you know well why do you need it
There is a big difference between finding Aix of interest and a desire to revive the relations because if the grass was greener. This behavior is peculiar to those who are tired of worries loneliness and constantly upset the cognitive therapist Paul DePompo. But it is bad out of the situation even if you think he is the best. I know a lot of efforts to revive the old relationship and they are as a rule begin stupid and end badly. The best option behavior experts said discussion of the relationship with current partner and a joint search for solutions.
3. Sometimes a second chance still falls
But for this we need the right moment. For example you have not seen for many years and both were free. An expert in the psychology of relationships Arm Michael said that such meetings took place between an average of 10 to 15 years and if both are satisfied with the state of affairs and why not?
4. Even if you are now free or divorced think twice before you start the search
If you found it and the heart beat faster easy to come to an excited state and do something silly. You can try to improve relations and to reach a new level if both of you are ready for it and overcome mistakes of the past says DePompo. But be sure to remove the rose colored glasses and look closely who has since become your ex.
5. You can try to fix it
Some important finding of the former to ask for forgiveness. Find him and apologize makes sense if you really want to apologize and do not require a response says psychotherapist Gail Soltts. But the correspondence in social networks is not suitable for to apologize or offer a big mistake to start all over again. Better personal conversation there’s nothing.
6. Bear in mind that you can properly assess the situation
For the separation is always a reason. The property of our memory save for the most part pleasant events says relationship expert Allison Abrams. At the same time ugly and even the terrible moments of the relationship fade over time and become less important.
8. The desire to find it is often only a longing for the past
We love to review films reminiscent of some moments in life and memories of past relationships evoke pleasant picture of the time. Sometimes people come together again only out of nostalgia says family therapist Talya Wagner. Memories make us think about what would we do differently. Very often attracted to the former who did not get out of life that on what counted.
9. Happy photos of the former can pursue you like ghosts
Designer clothing for swimming Jennifer Lowe says it never goes to a page of the former This is the way down and click on the photograph of him will not make you happier. Many people like to compare your current relationship with the life of ex boyfriends but what’s the point? Even if she is ugly or weighs more than 20 kilograms now he is with her and do not try to live their lives focus on her.
10. He writes in social media is not for you
If you saw his picture or post which caused jealousy or anger do not respond and do not pay attention he wrote it not in order to hurt thee. Develop a fitting resistance to the messages and images which are available on the pages of your ex advises Somich. People as a rule cherish their own space and do not provoke others for no reason. Be above it and move on.